Those Poor Aliens
Last night, I got sucked into watching Independence Day on cable for the umpteenth time. I hate to publish spoilers, but the in spite of overwhelming odds against us, we humans win the day and defeat the aliens.
Bryan had a great question. What about the poor aliens? Don’t they *ever* get to win? Think about it:
Aliens
Starship Troopers
The Thing
Puppet Masters
Invasion of the Body Snatchers
Star Trek
Independence Day
Men in Black
Babylon Five
War of the Worlds
And those are just the movies… At best, aliens manage to achieve a quasi-peaceful coexistence with humans (Klingons, humans in Star Trek), but usually we wipe the floor with them. The only time the aliens come close to winning is in Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, where alien bureaucracy demolishes Earth in the first scene, and in ET, where the alien is sympathetic and manages to escape.
What is your favorite science fiction alien? And why?
I think mine are the Vorlons, in Babylon Five, because they are so very alien. They are completely different than human in appearance and behavior and they do not conform to the classic alien cliches – grey alien, bug alien, shapeshifter-masquerading-as-human alien, etc.
August 5th, 2008
The Horta. Because she was a good mother, and had bad grammar.
August 5th, 2008
I’m tempted to say my favorite alien is David Bowie, but it’s probably less me being cool than it is me being kind of tired and having a hard time thinking straight right now.
The Thing and Invasion Of The Body Snatchers spoilers in the next paragraph–
There’s sort of an implication in John Carpenter’s version of The Thing and Don Siegel’s version of Invasion Of The Body Snatchers that things are not looking good for humanity. Come to think of it, doesn’t the Kaufman Body Snatchers end on an even lower note than the Siegel, with Donald Sutherland ratting out the last human in the film?
–spoilers done.
I think aliens in SF movies get a bad rap from critics because critics sometimes forget they’re usually not really aliens. The pod people in Body Snatchers are metaphors, not extraterrestrials, and getting hung up on their biology is maybe beside the point. Even the xenomorphs in Alien (and to a lesser extent Aliens, and let’s just pretend that was the end of the series) are really more about being big shiny balls of phobia–rape anxieties, pregnancy anxieties, parasite anxieties, etc.–than they are about whether acid blood makes sense or is cross-biological parasitism chemically possible or whatever. (Though Dan O’Bannon was kind of interested in some of the more sciencey angles: in his original script, the aliens had a culture of sorts based on parasitism, and the title was a sort of pun–”alien” as an adjective and not just the noun.)
This is part of the real reason Star Trek aliens are always people with painted skin or (in later versions) prosthetic foreheads. (The other reason being budgets.) They’re not really ETs, they’re surrogates. This is why one of the most ludicrous Trek aliens was also one of their most honest: the half-white, half-black/half-black, half-white humanoids from the original show; sure, it was cheesy from a science perspective, but sometimes allegory carries a sledgehammer (and ought to).
Now I’m babbling. Sorry.
August 5th, 2008
I really like the aliens in Farscape. They went out of their way to make them NOT human, and even when some of them looked humanoid, they weren’t, and it eventually became obvious. (Photosynthesis anyone?)
August 5th, 2008
As far as we know, the Bugs could have won the war in Starship Troopers. In the end, Rico was leading his platoon off to another battle. They might have all been wiped out.
August 5th, 2008
I always root for the Wraiths of Stargate Atlantis. The idea of them just intrigue the hell out of me, even if the execution of that idea in the show isn’t always the greatest.
Actually, I like a lot of the Stargate aliens. By and large they aren’t just humans with funny ears or noses; the differences aren’t just cultural ones like in Star Trek.
Also, about the Horta: Ensign Naraht from the TOS novels is totally made of awesome.
August 5th, 2008
Janiece, the Horta was unusual for ST in that she was totally different, not humanoid with a funky forehead and odd colored skin. I like her too.
Eric, you’re correct on the Body Snatchers. I just saw the last half hour or so of the Donald Sutherland/Karen Allen version recently and completely spaced that the aliens ‘won’. Your babbles are excellent – more insightful than my planned posts. Keep babbling.
August 5th, 2008
Michelle, I didn’t watch a whole lot of Farscape, but it did seem pretty creative and inventive. Plus, it introduced the word “frelling” to our alternative swearing lexicon, which is a great thing. Which alien was photysynthetic? I mostly remember the black & white woman.
MWT, I’ve never watched Stargate: Atlantis but did a quick read on the wraiths – they look like a pretty fascinating antagonist. I’m all for scientifically plausible life sucking villains – especially if they’re portrayed with some sympathy toward their culture and reason for being.
August 5th, 2008
Farscape was made of awesome, and Michelle’s right about the aliens. Henson’s shop made ‘em and moved ‘em, and totally showed up all the TV FX guys who are do CGI aliens. Which is right and proper, in my opinion.
And thanks for the vote of confidence, Jeri.
August 5th, 2008
Horta is a cool choice. And MWT, Ensign Naraht! Very cool obscure TOS novel reference…only in Diane Duane’s books, though.
I assume Tribbles can’t count…not intelligent.
As Jeri knows, I love Klingons. Since they allied with the Federation (last we know of) I guess they sort of got to win.
August 5th, 2008
Chewie.
I like the big furry ones.
August 5th, 2008
Jeri, the blue on was photosynthetic.
And although Farscape had it’s ups and downs, it was overall very well done. (Despite the leather fetish.)
August 5th, 2008
Bryan, you just like Klingon women.
BM, I like Chewie too, he’s my favorite Star Wars alien. The Ewoks and the Gungans… not so much. LOL The big furry aliens in Earth Girls are Easy were pretty fun too.
August 5th, 2008
Jeri, Bryan isn’t the only one.
Though many of them are fascinating (like Grilka).
August 5th, 2008
The Carmpan in the Fred Saberhagen “Berserker Wars” universe. If you haven’t read any of the books, they’re a very ancient race (tens of millions of years old) about whom little is known, except they are an ally against the deadly intelligent machines known as Berserkers. They are difficult to communicate with, have far-ranging mental abilities, are basically pacifistic, and prefer to do without mathematics (except for their Prophets of Probability).
August 5th, 2008
Jeri – I guess I do!
August 6th, 2008
Ensign Naraht also appeared in Peter Morwood’s books – that’s Diane Duane’s husband.
And I believe he made a few cameos in other people’s books as well, though I don’t remember whose offhand.
Zhaan (the blue photosynthetic woman) was fascinating. I wish she hadn’t left the show in the second(?) season…
Not only did I find the Wraiths sympathetic, I eventually decided that the Wraiths were actually the good guys and the humans (at least at Atlantis) the bad guys, only the writers didn’t seem to realize it. :p
The Carmpan sound like the Asgard in Stargate – ancient race tens of millions of years old, fighting self-replicating buglike machines called Replicators…
August 6th, 2008
I can’t remember what they’re called, but there was an episode of Stargate where they went to a vaguely medieval world and there was a big, brutish reptilian alien.
Otherwise, that’s a tough call. Nothing really strikes me as a favorite.
August 6th, 2008
I was also really sorry what Zhaan left, but I can understand why the makeup could get to be a bit much really quickly.
August 6th, 2008
Matt W: do you mean Unas?
There wasn’t just one episode with those. That race got developed out the wazoo and they’re really cool.
August 7th, 2008
MWT: Yeah, Unas sounds right. I’ve seen through season 7 of SG1 (i think, but it’s been a while) and I haven’t seen any of Atlantis yet.
One show I saw about a season’s worth of and liked, although it didn’t really have any aliens that wowed me, was Andromeda. It was hokey, sure, but it was a fun hokey.
August 26th, 2008
“THE PRESTON BRIEF”
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THE PRESTON BRIEF MUST BE READ BY ALL FREE CITIZENS OF THE WORLD. ONLY THE PEOPLE CAN DECIDE WHAT IS FACT, FICTION AND WHAT WILL HELP US CREATE A BETTER PLACE FOR OUR CHILDREN TO INHERIT.